Thank goodness there's a name
for this disorder.
Somehow I feel better
even though I have it!!

Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. -
Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is how it manifests:

I decide to water my garden.
As I turn on the hose in the driveway,
I look over at my car
and decide it needs washing.

As I start toward the garage,
I notice mail on the porch table that
I brought up from the mail box earlier.

I decide to go through the mail
before I wash the car.
I lay my car keys on the table,
put the junk mail in the garbage can
under the table,
and notice that the can is full.

So I decide to put the bills back on the table & take out the garbage first.
But then I think,
since I'm going to be near the mailbox
when I take out the garbage anyway,
I may as well pay the bills first.

I take my check book off the table,
and see that there is only one check left.
My extra checks are in my desk in the study,
so I go inside the house to my desk,
where I find the can of Pepsi
I'd been drinking.

I'm going to look for my checks,
but first I need to push the Pepsi aside
so that I don't accidentally knock it over.
The Pepsi is getting warm.
I decide to put it in the refrigerator
to keep it cold..
As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi,
a vase of flowers on the counter
catches my eye.
They need water..
I put the Pepsi on the counter and
discover my reading glasses that
I've been searching for all morning.

I decide I better put them back
on my desk,
but first I'm going to water the flowers.
I set the glasses back down on the counter,
fill a container with water
and suddenly spot the TV remote;
someone had left it on the kitchen table.

I realize that tonight
when we go to watch TV,
I'll be looking for the remote,
but I won't remember
that it's on the kitchen table,
so I decide to put it back in the den
where it belongs.
But first I'll water the flowers.
I pour some water in the flowers.
Quite a bit of it spills on the floor.
So, I set the remote back on the table,
get some towels and wipe up the spill.

Then I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day:
the car isn't washed
the bills aren't paid
there is a warm can of
Pepsi sitting on the counter
the flowers don't have enough water,
there is still only 1 check
in my check book,
I can't find the remote,
I can't find my glasses,
and I don't remember what
I did with the car keys.

Then, when I try to figure out
why nothing got done,
I'm really baffled because I know
I was busy all damn day,
and I'm really tired.

I realize this is a serious problem,
and I'll try to get some help for it,
but first I'll check my e-mail....

Do me a favor.
Forward this message to
everyone you know,
because I don't remember
who the hell I've sent it to.

Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet,
your day is coming!!

human clock

Click anywhere in the clock and it becomes digital, another click and it returns to normal.

Boy's First Condom

A Boy's First Condom.....

I recall my first time with a condom, I was 16 or so. I went in to buy a packet of condoms at Park Lane pharmacy.

There was this beautiful woman assistant behind the counter, and she could see that I was new at it. She handed me the package and asked if I knew how to wear one. I honestly answered, 'No, this is my first time.'

So she unwrapped the package, took one out and slipped it over her thumb. She cautioned me to make sure it was on tight and secure.

I apparently still looked confused. So, she looked all around the store to see if it was empty. It was empty.

'Just a minute,' she said, and walked to the door, and locked it..

Taking my hand, she led me into the back room, unbuttoned her blouse and removed it. She unhooked her bra and laid it aside.

'Do these excite you?', she asked.

Well, I was so dumb-struck that all I could do was nod my head.

She then said it was time to slip the condom on. As I was slipping it on, she dropped her skirt, removed her panties and lay down on a desk.
'Well, come on', she said, 'We don't have much time.'

So I climbed on her. It was so wonderful, that unfortunately, I could no longer hold back and KAPOW, I was done within a few moments.

She looked at me with a bit of a frown. 'Did you put that condom on?' she asked.

I said, 'I sure did,' and held up my thumb to show her.
That's when she beat the shit out of me.......

Happy New Year

Its been awhile since I have been here. The few weeks have been not stressful but busy. First it was the book fair at school. Then is was news from Florida that had me concerned, I went to Florida for a few days but there wasn't much I could do to assist with the situation. I felt helpless and not useful. After a few days I came home. It was a long drive down and a long drive back. But I went and i know things will work out but I just wish I could have done more. And they only other excuse is that life got busy, with the holidays and end of the semester work. i have about 2 days left before starting back to school, so I will begin the new year running, just to get ready for Monday.

I wish everyone a very Happy New Year. I know the new will be better then the old one. I just feel it. I pray with Gods help it will be a better new year for all of us.